It's odd how alcohol and drugs highlight most peoples lives. In a previous post I wrote about how in the past I was against all of that crap. Now it's even more prevalent that it also creates false friends. Many false friends who only care about partying. It's like, if I don't do all that shit, I am looked at as weird. If I don't join them, I am an outcast.
Alcoholism runs really bad on my dads side. My dad was the only one and is still the only one who doesn't drink or do drugs. Even though I don't know the man. I can assume that he has seen enough shit go down that common sense started to click. I can at least admire the guy for that epiphany. Just thinking about all the time and MONEY I wasted on all that shit. It almost consumed my life a couple of times. I am lucky that I am poor. If I were rich and went through that phase. Who knows what I would be doing. Now granted, it's not like I was some addict by no means. I easily could of became one.
Another observation I have been making is, no one does anything except work. I always thought people were out doing fun activities all the time. That doesn't seem to be the case at all.
Now, I go out and do fun stuff all the time, but mostly I do them by myself. About half the time I am with someone, but most of the time no one wants to do anything. They call my "fun", work. I can align with them and agree that my fun requires movement and concentration. Like yesterday for instance. My gas gage on my boat broke. I almost got stranded out on greenwood reservoir. All I had was a shitty battery which barely works. Every time the wind picked up I had to go to the front of the boat and paddle with a top of one of my tackle box containers. Now to me, even though it ruined my day of fishing. I found it fun in a way. My mission for the day was to get back to the boat launch going like .3 miles per hour and hoping the wind doesn't pick up or my battery doesn't crap out. I was way back on this 1200 acre lake. Almost as far as you can be away from the boat launch when my motor decided to spudder the words of no fuel. I am pretty sure a lot of people would have panicked in that situation, because my trolling motor peddle also broke and I lost my cell phone. (Yea it was a bad two days) I didn't get mad, a little irritated and cursed at the trolling motor a few dozen time cause it was being stupid. I still fished on my return back and found an excellent place where HUGE bluegill are spawning. I couldn't fish them since it was going to get dark soon. But I learned if I stay focused on my target and have faith I will get there. I will get to my destination. I knew I was going to get back. Even though everything pointed and said otherwise. I was alone and no one knew anything. Much of how my life is. Alone. I choose to be alone most of the time. I would rather much be alone then with someone who doesn't enjoy what I am doing. I am not going to apologize. To me, just sitting around and talking is boring. Going to party after party and just drinking can be fun for a little while. I get bored really fast in those environments. Give me 10 miles of forest and my objection is to hike with a 50 lb bag on my back and go save someones life. Now to me, that sounds like fun. That would be a challenge to go save that persons life. I could do something like that and feel pretty damn good about being there for that person. It would suck if they died, but I would give it my all. hmm.. being on a rescue squad like that sounds like a good idea. I am going to look into that.
I know I was suppose to talk more about American. Next time on my return from Madison I will talk about American.
Peace
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